Basic Instructions, Part 5

If you are new to my ongoing reality series on cartoonist Scott Meyer, start with this link to catch up: http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2007/08/basic-instruc-1.html Readers of this blog overwhelmingly preferred reading Basic Instructions in its original 4-panel and wordy format compared to the simpler strip format, the sort that newspapers are more willing…

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Basic Instructions, Part 1

Several months ago I clicked on a web link that led me to a comic called Basic Instructions, by Scott Meyer. I thought, “Damn, this is good.” So I sent him my compliments via e-mail. Scott replied, expressing deep suspicion that I was really the Dilbert cartoonist and not some…

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Rounders Vs. Accumulators

Most people have at least a few big problems in their life. But the vast majority of life’s problems are the little kind. There are two ways to deal with the little problems. ROUNDERS: This group rounds things off. A problem that’s a two on a scale of one to…

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How to Pick a President

When voting for a presidential candidate, keep in mind how often you will have to look at his or her face. This is especially important because presidents age quickly under the stress of the job. If you elect a president who is old and unattractive right out of the gate,…

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Minutia

One of the questions I get most often is “What is your day like?” There is no good answer to that question because it’s always so different. Today I will log my work day, almost as it happens: 5:00 am, PST Wake to BlackBerry alarm Eat a banana Check e-mail…

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F.U.T.B.

I’ll never forget the day: June 1st, 2007. I was playing tennis with my friend Peter, at ClubSport in Pleasanton. I had just opened a new can of Dunlop balls. We were hitting ground strokes to warm up. I bent down to pick up one of the balls. And there…

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Comic Asses

Did you see the character appearing in Dilbert this week with underpants on his head? I can explain. Here’s the version that ran in newspapers and on Dilbert.com on 11/21/06. Click the image to enlarge. [missing image] I was trying to show that the marketing guy has an ass for…

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Self Censorship

It’s generally accepted that humorists can poke fun at people for the choices they make but not the things outside of their control. For example, I can mock people who break laws, or support bad political decisions, or spend all of their money on dumbass things. Society calls those things…

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Fecalruba

Now I’ve done it. I’ve angered the entire population of Aruba with this comic on 6/14/06: [missing image] Man, did I get angry e-mail from Aruba when that comic ran. Apparently the Arubans, or Arubians, or Arubitarians – whatever they call themselves – think that Fecalruba is my way of…

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Asok’s Underpants

For contractual reasons I can’t show you a Dilbert comic before it appears in newspapers. But I can show you this cropped image from a comic that I planned for 6/24. Unfortunately it didn’t make it past the editors at my syndication company, United Media. They felt that many newspapers…

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Flying Monkey Butt

Apparently some newspaper chose not to run this Dilbert comic from 5/15/06 because it features a winged monkey emerging from a lawyer’s butt. [missing image] As you might have noticed, I enjoy trying to figure out what I can get away with. I thought this one cleverly avoided the classic…

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Space Heaters

My comic on 4-3-06 managed to make it past some editors but not all of them. At least one newspaper changed “Uranus” to “Pluto.” Did your newspaper edit it? [missing image] I love trying to sneak past the editors filthy concepts that can be interpreted in innocent ways. That gives…

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Comic Timing

One of the secrets of comedy is that sometimes you want your audience to be stumped for a fraction of a second before they figure out what the joke is. It’s like pulling back a rubber band and letting it snap in their brains. The trick is make the punch…

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Political Cartoons

People often ask me why I don’t draw political cartoons. So I tried one. I think you’ll agree that the world is better off without it. [missing image]  Click it to enlarge.

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Top the Editor

I‘m not allowed to show you a complete Dilbert comic before it runs in newspapers, but I’ll give you a sneak peak at one panel I submitted as part of an upcoming Sunday strip. Click on it to enlarge. [missing image] My editor objected to the word “porn” and asked…

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