I’ve noticed that a lot of people, if not most, have sharp disagreements with what they hallucinate to be my opinions. There are several skeptic-oriented websites that talk about my belief in magic and ESP. The skeptics leave brutal comments ripping me apart for my irrational beliefs. The only problem is that I don’t believe in magic or ESP. Someone with poor reading comprehension misunderstood something I wrote in one of my books and then convinced the other gullible, non-fact-checking skeptics that his hallucinations are true. It’s deliciously ironic.
Some evolution-oriented websites talk about my support for creationism and deride me for it. That would be fair if I supported creationism.
Recently I’ve been criticized for my opinion that people shouldn’t be allowed to e-mail a copy of a Dilbert comic to a friend. I don’t hold that opinion, but it doesn’t seem to matter.
Anyway, I’m trying out my new favorite response to the people who get angry over their hallucinations of my opinions:
“I agree with your analysis of your hallucination.”
In most cases I do agree with the argument presented. It’s only the premise that has a problem. Most of it sounds like this: “Scott Adams thinks that if an ear of corn has sex with a unicycle the offspring will be a unicorn. This is scientifically impossible!”
I used to say, “I don’t believe that!” But it sounds too disagreeable. Now I will just say, “I agree with your analysis of your hallucination.” That way I’m the kind of agreeable person you want as a friend.