The other day my future step kids, ages 6 and 8, were playing with my recumbent exercise bike. Their tiny butts both fit on the seat and they each controlled one pedal. I was watching TV nearby and overheard this conversation:
Justin (age 6): “Don’t pedal backwards!”
Savannah (age 8): “Why not?”
Justin: “When you pedal backwards, it makes you weaker!”
Savannah: “No it doesn’t.”
Justin: “It does! Scott told me. Ask him yourself!”
Savannah: “Scott, did you tell Justin that pedaling backwards makes you weaker?”
Me: “Um…I might have.”
It was then that I realized I probably ought to undo some other things I had told them, before they mention those things in school and get put in some sort of slow learner program. So the next time I was with Justin alone in the car I decided to come clean.
Me: “Justin, you know that medical device I used to determine that you were healthy?”
Justin: “Yes. Where is that thing? I want to see if I’m still healthy.”
Me: “Um…actually, that was just a y-connector for headphones. The reason it never beeped when I touched it to your forehead is that it doesn’t do that. It’s not really a medical device at all.”
Justin: “WHAT??? YOU MEAN I’M NOT HEALTHY???!!!”
Me: “No, no. You are perfectly healthy.”
Justin: “How can you tell?”
Me: “Um…by looking at you. You look healthy to me.”
(Long pause that seemed to say, “You are full of crap.”)
Justin: “Why did you say that thing can tell if I’m healthy?”
Me: “Um…I thought it was…funny.”
(long pause)
Justin: “It’s not funny.”