Recently people have been leaving comments saying they have detected my liberal bias. I’m starting to think they might be right. After all, if complete strangers with limited powers of perception think I’m a liberal, who am I to argue that point. And the evidence is clear. For example, I AM opposed to the death penalty in its current form. That’s a very liberal view. Specifically, I’d like to see two changes in the law:
1. No death penalty unless there’s forensic (DNA, fingerprints) at the crime scene or on the murder weapon. That would cut down on the killing of people who weren’t even in the room where the crime happened.
2. All executions would happen at the same time on the 4th of July, when all of the condemned are strapped to large fireworks and launched over the bay to be incinerated in spectacular fashion.
In addition to getting a last meal, each condemned person would get a choice of firework.
Guard: “Do you want the Starburst 4000 or the Pinwheel?”
Prisoner: “Which one goes highest before exploding?”
I’ve also been called out on the fact that I have not mocked liberals with the same frequency as I have mocked people who happen to be conservative. This is largely because the base requirement for being mocked for your actions is that you must have some actions. Quick, name three things that liberals have done lately!
It’s hard. The only thing that liberals do is act peeved at conservatives. It’s hard to call that “doing something.” Instead, I will take on the ultimate challenge. You knew this was coming. Today is just a tease. In tomorrow’s blog I will prove to you beyond all doubt that the theory of evolution is not completely true.
You won’t want to miss that one.