Tag: General nonsense

Suppose you had to pick one word to describe yourself. Your first reaction, I assume, is that it is impossible. You are so many different things, in so many different contexts. No one word can capture more than a tiny slice. Now suppose I ask you to think of people…

The FDA has decided that meat from clones is safe. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=18110949 This is a big relief, because I have a long term goal of cloning myself and then eating my clone. I don’t have a compelling reason to do it, but most goals are like that. No one really needs…

Recently I discovered I am a talented lyricist. This came as a big surprise to me. It all came together when I realized most songs I enjoy are gibberish. I can TOTALLY write gibberish! For decades I believed my favorite songs revolved around deep thoughts artistically embedded in metaphors and…

One view of the near future is that terrorists will get nukes and set the atmosphere on fire, or global warming will kill us all, or bird flu will create a pandemic, or the world economy will melt down, or all of those disasters will happen at once. I suppose…

Why would you vote for a president who has a different religion than you? If you are certain of the rightness of your own beliefs, and equally certain of the wrongness of a presidential candidate’s belief, that proves the candidate has, in your opinion, bad judgment about the most important…

I just returned from some vacation time near the beach, down the coast from where we live. I’m bad at taking vacations, in every way a person can be bad at an activity. For example, I never have the right attitude going into a vacation. I am told that the…

I take pride in small accomplishments. For example, I have always been proud that I could take any medicine, no matter how awful, without complaining. This is an extension of my greater power of liking, or at least tolerating, almost any food taste. It’s a gift. Recently, I met my…

I wonder if there is such a thing as natural allies, in terms of countries. I remember when the Soviet Union was whole, and the cold war was going strong, I predicted that someday the United States and Russia would be allies. We’re not exactly there, but we’re closing the…

The other day I cleaned off the top of my desk. This involved sorting the rubble into mounds that had something in common, and then dealing with each mound. There were bills to pay, records to update, forms to be completed, faxes to be sent, licenses to approve, documents to…

Last week, my in-laws were in town. While they were out visiting some other relatives, I took my turn watching their dog, Mollie. At this point, I should pause and mention that I haven’t had a dog since I was a kid. And in those days, in the country, when…

When I was researching green technology, I was disappointed to find out that no amount of solar panels can get you off the power grid. You also need a way to store the power for night use, and that technology is not yet economical or convenient. There’s something cool about…

Some of you already saw this story. A man was fired for posting a Dilbert comic that suggested his management was a bunch of drunken lemurs. http://www.desmoinesregister.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071219/NEWS/712190360 [no longer available] Over the years, a number of people have approached me in public, or e-mailed me, to say they also got…

Once again, I find myself having a socially inappropriate response to the news. This time it involves the two inmates who tunneled their way out of jail. http://news.aol.com/story/_a/sexy-posters-used-in-daring-jailbreak/20071217165409990001 [no longer available] If all they had done was tunnel to freedom, I would have been impressed with their work ethic and…

Recently I wrote a series for Dilbert where Asok the intern dies, and is cloned back to life. But his DNA gets mixed up with a Snickers candy bar and he becomes half human, half snack. In the third panel of that comic, Asok awakes and asks, “Why do I…