Tag: General nonsense

Did you notice that the The Dilbert Blog archive suspiciously disappeared last spring? A big publisher agreed with your frequent suggestions that I should turn the funnier posts into a book. So I did, and as part of that deal removed the book content from the Internet. The book’s title…

Yesterday I blogged about a practical joke you could play if you attended a hypnotist’s stage show. That very afternoon, by a cosmic coincidence, I ended up in the audience of a hypnotist’s stage show. I did not try my prank. About a month ago, I got a message saying…

A reader sent me a link about some students who allegedly had trouble coming out their trances after a hypnotist’s stage act. http://www.abc4.com/news/local/story.aspx?content_id=082e7301-203d-470d-a8c1-2e83a2075614 [no longer available] I don’t know what really happened, but as a trained hypnotist, I can assure you that no one had trouble coming out of a…

My front door makes a maddening squeaky-creaky noise when opened. I could solve that problem by putting a bit of WD-40 on the hinge. Every day, for three years, I have considered doing just that. But every day, for three years, something else seemed more important at that moment. My…

According to your comments, yesterday’s post was my worst ever. Most people seemed to think I was beating a dead horse with a stick made entirely of my own condescension. I was preachy and boring and the lack of penis references bordered on irresponsible. So what the hell got into…

Whenever you read a story about a potential scientific breakthrough, you can safely assume it is complete bullshit. The news is full of stories of cures for diseases that don’t work in the long run, and new sources of energy that aren’t as practical as we hoped. But it is…

When it comes to selecting my Halloween costume, I ask four questions: 1. Can I wear my glasses?2. Does it cover my legs so I can pretend I’m dancing?3. How difficult is it to take a whiz?4. Does it allow me to be witty? One year I wore a cow…

Did you notice that the The Dilbert Blog archive suspiciously disappeared last spring? A big publisher agreed with your frequent suggestions that I should turn the funnier posts into a book. So I did, and as part of that deal removed the book content from the Internet. The book’s title…

One of the services I provide to hetero male readers of this blog is teaching you how to obtain sex from women who are too good for you. To that end, I scour the Internet looking for scientific articles that can give you an edge. Recently, I found a doozy….

In my area, although the weather is generally good, there are lots of indoor recreation businesses: indoor tennis, bowling, indoor bocce, billiards, ice skating, roller skating, indoor soccer, batting cages, basketball, and so on. One thing they all have in common is that they are empty for more than half…

Researchers have found an area of the brain that gets active when people have religious experiences. http://www.sciam.com/print_version.cfm?articleID=434D7C62-E7F2-99DF-37CC9814533B90D7&repost=with_catchy_title [no longer available] I know you’re expecting me to say this proves religion is just an illusion caused by the brain. But I’m not. If God exists, it seems entirely reasonable that he’d…

Until recently, I was a semi-silent investor in two local restaurants: Stacey’s Café and Stacey’s at Waterford. My long-time business partner, Stacey, co-owned and managed them. My duties involved smiling and nodding while pretending to understand what was going on. Eventually Stacey would make a recommendation with implications that I…

There’s a fascinating article in the New York Times about something social scientists call a cascade. It’s a process by which one expert’s wrong opinion spreads to other experts until they all believe it must be true because all the experts say so. http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/09/science/09tier.html It makes you wonder if there…

Some years ago I drew a Dilbert comic in which Dilbert invented what he called tubular luggage. Several garage bands e-mailed to ask if they could use the name Tubular Luggage. Apparently “Tubular Luggage” just jumps out as an obvious name for a musical group. I had the same experience…

There’s a guy I know, but not well. He’s polite and friendly. He’s average looking. He means well. As far as I can tell, he’s a good citizen. And yet, every time I see him, I want to beat him to death with a shovel and bury him in a…