Scott Adams: In his own words
I was happy to hear that NYC didn’t allow Iranian President Ahmadinejadto place a wreath at the WTC site. And I was happy that ColumbiaUniversity is rescinding the offer to let him speak. If you let a guy likethat express his views, before long the entire world will want freedomof…
Read MoreReaders have complained that I keep posting on stories involving penises. Apparently that is not highbrow enough for some of you. Well, unlike some authors, I listen to my readers. So today I am elevating the discussion. Did you hear that scientists discovered a new use for men’s balls? Apparently…
Read MoreIn the news, firefighters in Lansing, Michigan used a forklift to remove a 900-pound man from his home. http://www.clickondetroit.com/news/14147898/detail.html [no longer available] First, let me say I have a policy against making fun of overweight people. I am not superstitious, and do not believe in will power. Every moist robot…
Read MoreDid you ever wonder why movies are too long? I’ve heard the theory that it’s because directors have too much power compared to the past, when the studio could order them to edit a movie. A top director these days has the contractual right to final edit, and the director…
Read MoreDid you read about the Nebraska state senator who is suing God to make a point about frivolous lawsuits? http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20827350/ [no longer available] Your first reaction might be that God has infinite resources and could mount a perfect defense. But I think God would stay out of the details, as…
Read MoreIn the news, O.J. Simpson is in jail for trying to reclaim some items in Las Vegas that an alleged thief stole from him. If O.J. is found guilty of asking a thief to return his belongings, he could go to jail for 30 years. I assume O.J. is kicking…
Read MoreA number of celebrities, notably Madonna, are embracing a religion called Kabbalah. Celebrities I say! That is all the endorsement I need. I decided it was time to look into it. I started with Wikipedia. Here’s what I learned about Kabbalah: 1. It’s all very confusing.2. No one is quite…
Read MoreDid you see the story about the German guy with two penises? He lost his original equipment in an accident, so doctors built him a new one. Later, he decided to upgrade, but doctors left the previous one until the new one took root, so to speak. http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1315211.html [no longer…
Read MoreI was flipping through the channels last night and came across Justin Timberlake giving a concert. He’s a hugely successful artist. People all over the world love him. He’s sold tens of millions of CDs. This presented me with a mystery. To me, Justin Timberlake sounds like a shockingly untalented…
Read MoreThe other day I blogged about an idea for creating farms of Stirling engines to generate power in the desert, and financing them through individual investments in each engine. Predictably, I got a lot of comments that fell into one of these categories. 1. It will never work. 2. Someone…
Read MoreAs a watcher of all things media, I am always impressed when a PR person makes a huge story out of nothing. A good example is the recent press about research showing how liberals and conservatives have different brains. http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/237131/ [no longer available] This ground-breaking study shows that the brain…
Read MoreHave you ever heard of a Stirling engine? According to Wikipedia, they look like huge male genitalia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stirling_engine I mention this only because these huge penis engines can save the world by being placed in deserts and used to create cheap electricity from the heat of the sun. http://www.wired.com/science/planetearth/news/2005/11/69528 [no…
Read MoreIn my ongoing reality series, I continue advising Scott Meyer on how to become a syndicated cartoonist. Most recently, I asked Scott to try drawing some strips with three panels and fewer words. That’s the formula for successful syndication in newspapers because newspapers traditionally avoid buying anything else. Every writer…
Read MoreIn my ninth grade science class, the teacher told us that heat was essentially energy. I raised my hand and asked, “If heat is energy, what is cold?” The teacher said, “Cold is the lack of energy.” I always remember that because, like coldness, the lack of something often feels…
Read MoreIn the news, a gang of neo-Nazis was arrested………………..in Israel. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070909/ap_on_re_mi_ea/israel_neo_nazis [no longer available] The gang recorded their violent crimes on video. This is a good idea in case you’re not doing enough to get caught and prosecuted. One of the gang members says, “Heil Hitler” on the video. His…
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