Tag: General nonsense

A reader sent this story about his workplace. ————-“A theme from many of your previous comics came true to life for us today. Quality in the workplace. Yesterday, a pointy-haired boss decided our meeting room needed nice motivational pictures on the wall. Twelve by eight inch, wooden frame, 1940s-style motivational…

Since I know some of you will whine about seeing another Basic Instructions post (below), I give you this bonus post. I’m a big fan of creative cussing. When I was a kid, in Windham NY, one of the older boys invented this friendly threat: “Don’t make me drag you…

Yesterday I experienced another freaky happening.  I had just started writing a post about time travel using focused gravitational fields to form a closed timelike curve, when a reader e-mailed me an article about a dwarf getting his penis stuck in a vacuum cleaner. Total coincidence! http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20070820/od_afp/entertainmentbritain [no longer available]…

I was alarmed at how many people forwarded me the story of a pet camel humping his owner to death, as if this might be the sort of thing I would mirthfully blog about. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20347997/ [no longer available] I am disgusted by all of you. There is nothing funny about…

My favorite story of the week, if not my entire life, involves China passing a law banning Tibetan monks from reincarnating without permission. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20227400/site/newsweek/ [no longer available] My first reaction was something along the lines of “Ha ha! You can’t regulate reincarnation!” Then I realized China manufactured every article of…

When I was taking hypnosis classes our instructor taught us a seduction technique. It was more of a joke than a functional method, designed to make a point about how the brain works. It goes like this… After you get your date back to your place, and you haven’t closed…

You aren’t seeing reruns of Dilbert comics this week. You did indeed see the coffee-swilling beaver saying exactly what he’s saying in those comics, but you saw it here in this blog, as I described my process for making those comics. You saw the punchline but not the whole comic…

I’ve said before in this blog that it feels to me as if all of my ideas already exist, and I’m nothing but some sort of antennae. Every time I have an idea, no matter how strange, that idea inevitably finds its way to my door from some other source….

When I read The Da Vinci Code, I enjoyed it because I thought the historical information was based on fact. It wasn’t, and I’m glad I know that now. I’m doubly glad I didn’t know it when I read the book, as it would have spoiled the fun. Sometimes bullshit…

If you are new to my ongoing reality series on cartoonist Scott Meyer, start with this link to catch up: http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2007/08/basic-instruc-1.html In an earlier post I advised Scott to try focusing on relationship themes, to make the strip “about something,” and therefore more marketable. The readers of this blog overwhelmingly…

I hate it when any country does something better than my country. It’s embarrassing. The indignity reached its peak with the latest report on life expectancy. The United States is ranked 42nd. Who is at the top, you might ask? Japan? No. Switzerland? No. Today I learned there is a…

I have many critics. Perhaps you’ve noticed. Lately their ranks have swelled. Obviously I’m doing something right. For example, my recent post about immigration has caused quite a stir on white supremacist web sites that are urging a boycott of all things Dilbert. Their argument goes like this: 1. We…

Scott Meyer asked me to post this message to you: I just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you who took the time to go look at my work. Your comments have been very useful, and so overwhelmingly positive as to make me question their authenticity. (Scott…