Tag: General nonsense

I get a lot of Dilbert suggestions by e-mail. Many of them are allegedly based on real events. Sometimes I think the alleged real events are not so real. Here’s one that is so bizarre that it has to be genuine: — Begin e-mail — “About 4,000 nerds go to…

In my blog on 10/20/06 I explained my unsupported quack theory that depression is really a lack of energy. I wondered if giving depressed people speed would make them happy. While most of you agreed that exercise, nutrition and general health are important contributors to mood, no one was willing…

In today’s Dilbert comic (12-8-06), Dilbert uses the expletive “frack.” As fans of the excellent TV drama Battlestar Galactica know, the crew of Galactica yell “frack” several times per episode as a substitute for the other f-word. Galactica is a military ship under continuous threat of annihilation by Cylons. If…

People have often told me that I seem smarter than I really am. I accept the compliment. As you know, appearances are more important than substance. And so, because I love you, I will teach you some tricks for appearing smarter than you are. Believe me, it comes in handy….

I sometimes have big problems. I always find time to work on solving my big problems because they are so big that I can’t ignore them even if I try. I also have lots of tiny problems, such as getting an itch in the middle of my back. I always…

Do you ever have an idea that you know won’t work and yet you don’t know what’s wrong with it? For example, I have a plan for becoming the world’s best pole vaulter via a process of overeating and walking around. That’s two-thirds of the entire plan right there. The…

Sometimes I wonder why music is legal. Music can alter your mood and your body chemistry just like any illegal drug. The fact that it goes into your body through your ear shouldn’t make a difference. We take drugs via practically every other hole in our body – mouth, butt,…

When I think about a topic, it’s almost always in the form of how I would explain my views to a hypothetical other person. Then I imagine how it would sound to the other person and judge the worthiness of my thought that way. Thoughts without words are just feelings,…

In an earlier post I said Bill Gates would make an excellent president because he’s a successful businessman, makes decisions based on reason instead of superstition, and has a track record of trying to help the poor through his foundation. Apparently I am not alone. There’s a new web site…

I rarely offend PEOPLE in my blog or comic strip. But I often offend OTHER people. By that I mean that for 18 years I have been getting the following sort of e-mail, and now blog comment: “Mr. Adams – Your (blog or comic) today was highly offensive to ambidextrous…

What one simple problem could you eliminate – let’s say using magic – that would fix virtually every other problem in the world? You might say that poverty is the biggest single problem. There’s a good argument for that. But I’m reasonably sure that if everyone on the planet suddenly…

Before I got married I did many things correctly. I attribute my excellent performance to the fact that I have astonishingly low standards for just about everything that doesn’t directly affect my health. My plan for happiness was to set the bar low and clear it by a mile. It…

I always laugh when someone finds the fewest words to describe a complicated situation. My old boss at Pacific Bell, Mike, was a master of philosophical brevity. I remember one day working in the technology lab where several of us shared work benches. We were having an ongoing debate about…